Maturing Children

Proactive vs. Reactionary EQ for Kids

After doing several seminars for parents, one of the main questions we are asked is what to do when a child has lost control or has become overly emotional.

This is a difficult question to answer because every situation is different. Typically, the child's brain is in a state of "emotional hijacking" and therefore the best thing is to let things calm down. There are many different techniques for that.

This leads to a very important understanding that it is better to be proactive versus reactionary when it comes to building EQ skills with children.

Leadership is Proactive

It is very difficult to be a leader in the family when everything is reactionary. In reactionary situations, the children have the power. Children learn quickly how to make parents react. They find the emotional button and press it constantly. While reactionary skills are important, it is proactive leadership that creates the foundation for future success.

Trust the Foundation

When building a structure, the foundation is critical. The deeper the foundation, the more sturdy the building. Being proactive and playing CONVERSATIONS That with children when they are not in a emotional state will create a foundation to lean on when a reactionary situation does occur.

This requires trust. You must trust that the EQ skills your children are learning will pay future dividends--not just when reactionary situations occur, but when they become leaders themselves at work and in other social circles.

20 Minutes a Week

Try the exercises in this article just 20 minutes a week for proactive EQ development time. You will see a difference short and long term.

Thanks for being courageous parents!