Stealth: Best Way to Practice SOAr

In our experience, the best way to practice SOAr is to do it in "stealth mode," without others knowing it. This is not being deceptive in anyway--it actually enhances every conversation. The goal does not even need to be Collaborative Change.

Try to be intentional about using just one SOAr technique as many times as possible during one conversation. For example, you may decide to always ask open questions to everybody you see for the day.

The most important one to practice is reflection. You can use reflections everywhere.

Observe the impact of SOAr on your day-to-day conversations. The more you experience the benefits, the more motivated you will be to practice more. The more positive results you achieve, the easier it will be to retain the knowledge and use it without thinking. Pretty soon, you will be completely on autopilot.

Another helpful tactic is to debrief your conversations. This can be done by recording your experiences in a journal, or by talking with someone who is familiar with CONVERSATIONS That, which will give your brain a chance to process what worked and what could be improved.

Don't forget to practice "I feel" statements. Go through the set of emotions and keep expanding your vocabulary. This will make practicing SOAr that much easier.