Emotional Intelligence in Marriages

We don't believe "irreconcilable differences" is a valid reason to end a marriage. Without exception, there will always be irreconcilable differences in every marriage. Therefore, the single greatest determining factor for long-lasting unions is how married couples work through those differences. This always starts and ends with emotionally intelligent communication.

Top Reasons Marriages Fail

All of the following reasons that marriages fail can be chalked up to irreconcilable differences. However, they can all be addressed through high EQ and healthy communication. By developing emotional intelligence skills for tough conversations, marriages are protected. Marriage is the foundation for a thriving society. Without healthy families with healthy marriages, we do not have healthy futures.

Negative Talk

Nagging, insulting, being condescending, or speaking disrespectfully about each other to peers is a sure sign of impending marriage failure. Healthy, emotionally intelligent communication puts a stop to this before it begins.

Me/You vs. We

Couples that don't see unity in their relationship can take on a me/you = win/lose mentality. This never works. Everybody wins with healthy, emotionally intelligent conversations that bring both partners into collaboration.

Friendships that Cross the Line

When couples can't communicate with each other, they often confide in "friends." This leads to crossing the line into emotional affairs that start off as innocent friendships. Healthy, emotionally intelligent conversations between couples always ensure emotional needs are being met at home. This also protects the marriage with healthy boundaries in regards to external relationships.

Surrounded by Low EQ

High EQ individuals often have relationships with other high EQ individuals. The opposite is, of course, true. Low EQ relationships are at risk of being surrounded by negativity, "Yes-men," or those that do not champion marriage at all. It's much more tempting to take the easy way out of marriage challenges when surrounded by the wrong people.

Marriage Based on Feelings

Marriage is a commitment. It's not an easy commitment either, but it is a commitment regardless of how you feel. Healthy, emotionally intelligent conversations help you process individual feelings and respond appropriately to protect the marriage commitment.

EQ Before Marriage

It is never too early to start developing healthy, emotionally intelligent communication skills. Having conversations that protect marriage will help reduce unspoken expectations that may surface after the wedding. This is like pouring a solid foundation that can then be built upon. This foundation will not crack in the future.

Frequently Asked Questions >

Methodology Articles >


(Conversational EQ) really helped me to start using feeling words to express myself to my wife. As a man, I felt awkward at first expressing my feelings but now with the help of this card game I feel more comfortable and more confident.
— Jon K.
This was a great conversational catalyst that allowed my husband and I to understand one another and gave us the tools to talk through issues that have been major divisive points between us. We have been equipped for conversations that promote vulnerable relationship. I’m overwhelmingly happy!
— Jenny K.